Dean and I met when we were 28 years old. It had been years since I dated anyone. Lots of waiting, lots of loneliness. So when we met, we were ready to find our God-given spouse.
But, we lived miles apart. In the beginning we only saw each other once or twice a month, and eventually every weekend.
Within two months, on September 4, 1994, Dean shared with no hesitation those three small words that hold such depth of emotion, “I love you.”
I remember that day. I was looking up, way up, at him. Dean is 6’5″ and I am just about 5’8″ so I look up to him a lot! I was thrilled that he said those words, but a little reserved about whether I should say them back. I paused.
With a little fear that he might be disappointed, I said, “I believe you. And I am not quite ready to say that yet, but I do believe you.” He looked at me with a tenderness and said, “Cheryl, I didn’t tell you I love you so that you would say it back. I told you I love you because I couldn’t hold it in any longer.”
My heart melted.
It wasn’t much later when I told him “I love you” and within the year we were married.
Now married 21 years, we have experienced a lot of love and a lot of forgiveness. Lots of saying “I love you” and lots of saying “I’m sorry.” Lots of confessing how we went wrong or treated one another poorly.
Just last week I confessed a wrong. Instead of asking him about whether to use cash or points for a purchase, I just used cash. This may seem small but we work together on all of our expenses and I had not done what we normally do. I felt horrible. Definitely felt the Lord’s conviction and quickly made it right by apologizing to Dean and to God.
This may seem small, but the truth is, this one decision brought distance between Dean and me. And that is no fun at all.
God has been speaking to me a lot lately about confession, repentance, and forgiveness. What would it look like if repentance and forgiveness were a regular part of my day? What if they were a regular part of my conversations with God?
I recently read through a list of areas for repentance. It’s author, Charles Finney, and others encourage us not to simply practice general confession but to practice specific confession.
Sometimes we can minimize sin and “forget” to confess. Each time we ignore the “good” God wants us to do, each time we minimize the wrong choice – when we don’t stop long enough to consider areas that may cause distance between us and God, we miss out. Anne Graham Lotz reminds us that we are already forgiven but we need to confess our sin so that we don’t miss out on a growing, closening relationship with God. We want Him near to our hearts.
And, we pray for revival. One of the attributes of revival is to acknowledge personally and individually where we are wrong. When we stray from God’s commands, let’s confess it. Just you and me. Just personally. Before we begin to call others to this.
We’ve begun the second half of the year. Today, let’s take time to consider how we obeyed God so far this year. Let’s reflect on areas that we believe God wants us to address. How are we doing? And, let’s start the second half of 2016 strong. Let’s start with prayer … and some confession.
By the way, below is a link to the Charles Finney article with the list I referred to. Maybe you’d like to use this as part of your time with God. You can confess one area for each day! Seems like a lot, but the good news is that God helps us even in our repentance. Remember, God’s love for us is so much more than we could ever offer Him … and He can’t hold it in!
Come and listen, all you who fear God,
and I will tell you what he did for me.
For I cried out to him for help,
praising him as I spoke.
If I had not confessed the sin in my heart,
the Lord would not have listened.
But God did listen!
He paid attention to my prayer.
Praise God, who did not ignore my prayer
or withdraw his unfailing love from me.
– Psalm 66:16-20, NLT
“Sin flourishes when we treat it like a cream puff rather than a rattle snake.”
– Billy Sunday
The Power of Personal Repentance
Cheryl Lee Davis
August 1, 2016 [printfriendly]